Flat Rock, Torrey Pines Beach

Flat Rock, Torrey Pines Beach, San Diego California

As the very last winter storm passed through Southern California, I hustled down the Flat Rock trail from the state park above with this photograph in mind. Intermittent rain, big clouds and wind were on the menu. I was carrying a tripod, pack and large format camera – the whole deal – and as the light faded I ran down most of the trail. A few days before, my friend Philipp Rittermann had nailed a lovely sun-drenched picture of the cliffs and that image was with me as I set up. The tide was rising fast and as the sun sat on the horizon it found a layer in the clouds that allowed just enough light to skitter across the ocean and kiss the sandstone cliffs. When you create a photograph, you end up bringing a lot of your interior life to the image and sometimes the camera helps you articulate a feeling in a way words cannot. The dark palette and dangerously swirling water matched my feelings.

I was born in California and since the age of thirteen or fourteen I’ve been acutely aware of the media images of sunny Malibu, lovely surfers and bright blue skies: California is for sale. But there’s another side to the west. Charles Bukowski. John Fante. Jim Morrison said: “the days are bright and filled with pain – enclose me in your gentle rain”. The California I inhabit is considerably more poignant than the well lit television version. It’s contradictory, interesting and sad in a kind of paradise gone to hell sort of way.